Is Change Good for the Soul?

Can people really change? This is a tough question. I think that there are plenty of people in relationships who don't see people: they see potential. To marry your high school sweat heart is to marry the person you hope they'll become. However, there comes a point where people are who they are. This, of course, begs the next question: is there an us? If we change, is there a part of us that never changes? If not, our old friends and lovers are really just the aliens who now occupy their bodies.

I have traveled across the planet. I've made hundreds of friends and lost almost as many. Love has come in and out of my life like the glimpses of mournful ghosts. I sometimes stare at myself in the mirror and look for the boy I knew. I'm not always sure I want to find him.

Pro Athletes

Since they are professionals, should pro athletes only look at money when choosing where to play? Some might argue that at their incomes, a few million dollars won't have an appreciable impact, so they should rather consider their fan base, hometowns, family, etc. What do you think?


I bring this up in light of Jeremy Lin's recent move to the Houston Rockets. Here's a guy that no team gave him a chance. Finally, the Knicks gave that to him and now he's leaving. Also, Lin has become a celebrity player with fans across the country. Knicks games air nationally while Rockets games get much less coverage, so he would be harder to follow. Do celebrities owe a debt to their fans?

Why Not Have Kids?

I remember my own childhood, not fondly, but I do remember. One phenomenon I recall distinctly was the question that children asked each other: do you have any brothers or sisters?

This was a great question. Kids who were only children were typically obnoxious. They didn't share. They were mean and rude. Kids from big families had lots of toys. Older siblings typically had cooler toys. A big brother could teach you a dirty word. An older sister might teach you how to talk to girls or what to wear. However, there were limits. If there were three children, it was great, maybe even four. Five kids, though, solicited comments like, "That's a big family."

Heck, families used to have minivans because they sat seven. In a big family, only one child would get to invite a friend on an outing.

I currently do not have any friends with more than two kids. When I meet someone who has three kids, I say, "Wow, big family." If they say four or more I ask them if they're Mormon. Did you and your wife have kids separately before you met each other?

If I meet these large families, I scan their little tow-topped faces, looking for the one who resembles the mailman.

And I'm not the only one. Everyone I know wants to ask, "Why?" when they meet someone with more than two kids. I can't answer for the puppymills, but I can explain the inquisitors. We understand that everyone makes a mistake: that's why you have kid. We even understand that you didn't want to talk to it, so you made it a little friend. However, you can't keep making the same mistake and expect us to be understanding. We have our limits.